Fourteen reasons men have dogs instead of wives:
1. The later you are, the more excited your dog is to see you.
2. Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name.
3. Dogs like it if you leave things on the floor.
4. A dog's parents never visit.
5. Dogs understand that you have to raise your voice to get your point across.
6. You never have to wait on a dog. They are ready to go at a moment's notice.
7. Dogs find you amusing when you are drunk.
8. Dogs like to go hunting and fishing.
9. Dogs will not wake you up at night and ask, "If I die, would you get another dog?"
10. lf a dog has babies, you can put an ad in the paper and get rid of them.
11. A dog will let you put a studded collar on it and not call you a pervert.
12. If a dog smells another dog on you, they don't get mad. They just think it is interesting.
13. Dogs like to ride in the back of a pick-up truck.
14. If a dog leaves you, it does not take half of your stuff.
If you would like to test this theory, lock your dog and your wife in the garage and see who is glad to see you when you open the door.