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There was a time when insults showed thoughtfulness.
1. "I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; Bring a friend, if you have one."
- George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill.
"Cannot possibly attend first night, I will attend the second...If there is one."- Winston Churchill, in response.
2. A member of Parliament to Disraeli: "Sir, you will either die on the gallows, or of some unspeakable disease."
"That depends, Sir," said Disraeli, "whether I embrace your policies or your mistress."
3. "He had delusions of adequacy." - Walter Kerr
4. "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." - Clarence Darrow
5. "He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary."
- William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway).
6. "Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I’ll waste no time reading it." - Moses Hadas
7. "I didn’t attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it."- Mark Twain
8. "He has no enemies but is intensely disliked by his friends.”- Oscar Wilde
9. "I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here."- Stephen Bishop
10. "He is a self-made man and worships his creator."- John Bright
11. "I’ve just learned about his illness. Let us hope it’s nothing trivial."- Irvin S. Cobb
12. "He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others."- Samuel Johnson
13. "He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up."- Paul Keating
14. "In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily."- Charles, Count Talleyrand
15. "He loves nature in spite of what it did to him." - Forrest Tucker
16. "Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?"- Mark Twain
17. "His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork."- Mae West
18. "Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go."- Oscar Wilde
19. "He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... For support rather than illumination."
- Andrew Lang (1844-1912)
20. "He has Van Gogh's ear for music."- Billy Wilder
21. "I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn’t it."- Groucho Marx.
22. "He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire."- Winston Churchill
1. "I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; Bring a friend, if you have one."
- George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill.
"Cannot possibly attend first night, I will attend the second...If there is one."- Winston Churchill, in response.
2. A member of Parliament to Disraeli: "Sir, you will either die on the gallows, or of some unspeakable disease."
"That depends, Sir," said Disraeli, "whether I embrace your policies or your mistress."
3. "He had delusions of adequacy." - Walter Kerr
4. "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." - Clarence Darrow
5. "He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary."
- William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway).
6. "Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I’ll waste no time reading it." - Moses Hadas
7. "I didn’t attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it."- Mark Twain
8. "He has no enemies but is intensely disliked by his friends.”- Oscar Wilde
9. "I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here."- Stephen Bishop
10. "He is a self-made man and worships his creator."- John Bright
11. "I’ve just learned about his illness. Let us hope it’s nothing trivial."- Irvin S. Cobb
12. "He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others."- Samuel Johnson
13. "He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up."- Paul Keating
14. "In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily."- Charles, Count Talleyrand
15. "He loves nature in spite of what it did to him." - Forrest Tucker
16. "Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?"- Mark Twain
17. "His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork."- Mae West
18. "Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go."- Oscar Wilde
19. "He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... For support rather than illumination."
- Andrew Lang (1844-1912)
20. "He has Van Gogh's ear for music."- Billy Wilder
21. "I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn’t it."- Groucho Marx.
22. "He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire."- Winston Churchill
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