# Don't Read without a sense of humor!



## JohnT (Feb 27, 2014)

OK, 

So I have been very good lately! There have been a lot of Welch's teasing going on and I have looked the other way..... 

Holding back.... 
until now!


Ladies and Gentlemen, 

My I please present to you the first ever report on the WMT Welch's Wine competition...


Welch.pdf 

View attachment Welch.pdf


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## cmason1957 (Feb 27, 2014)

Oh that might just rile the masses just a bit, but I got a great chuckle out of it. 

I am on the anti-welches bandwagon as well, can't stand the smell of it and wonder why anyone might drink it on purpose. Although, I might make a batch for my wifes family. They love anything sweet and I don't waste the good stuff on them.


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## JohnT (Feb 27, 2014)

CMason, 

It was really meant to be just a joke and not to offend people. Can't wait until Dan or JS read it!


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## Elmer (Feb 27, 2014)

Bwahahahahahahaha!!!


But I have to say after making a batch of Welches, I am now in John's corner!
I would much rather drink kit wine, DB, SP or store bought swill (while playing with happy fun ball) than the welches I made.

I am sure others out make it great, just like some people can make a meal out of SPAM.
It just aint me!


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## Boatboy24 (Feb 27, 2014)

Elmer said:


> (while playing with happy fun ball)



A classic!

[ame]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7gzDC-2ZO8I[/ame]

Nice work John. The New York Times will be calling any moment!


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## dralarms (Feb 27, 2014)

Lol. Funny stuff right there


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## Kraffty (Feb 27, 2014)

So I'm confused..... you're still looking forward to judging right???
Mike


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## Julie (Feb 27, 2014)

Oh JohnT are you using your get out of jail free card for this joke


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## wineforfun (Feb 27, 2014)

Well, John, I see you have had some extra time on your hands. I must say, though I am a jswordy disciple, that was very well written and very entertaining.

For those of you that keep referring to Welchs as being "sweet", that is because you are making it sweet, don't backsweeten it. I just made a batch of Welchs, left it dry and oaked it and I must say, it has a very unique flavor.

Ok, off to Etrade to purchase some more Welchs stock.


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## olusteebus (Feb 27, 2014)

I read it with a sense of humor. Now I am nauseated. I wish I had not read it at all , with a sense of humor or not.


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## fabrictodyefor (Feb 27, 2014)

I made a Welches grape juice and blackberry Dragon's Blood that is AWSOME! I am on my second batch with plans on getting a third one going....mmmmm maybe I should also do some investing!
However, your article made me chuckle.


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## JohnT (Feb 27, 2014)

fabrictodyefor said:


> I made a Welches grape juice and blackberry Dragon's Blood that is AWSOME! I am on my second batch with plans on getting a third one going....mmmmm maybe I should also do some investing!
> However, your article made me chuckle.


 

Fabri: Making you chuckle was exactly my intent. 

Olustibus: sorry about that...

Julie: The card is in the mail and on it's way back to you as we speak.


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## jswordy (Feb 27, 2014)

Whatever. Can't understand why the guy who hates the stuff was picked to judge it and all the folks here who love it were passed by. Now to me, that's funny!

*PROUD TO BE AN AMERICAN WINEMAKER!*


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## GreginND (Feb 27, 2014)

Bravo!


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## dralarms (Feb 27, 2014)

Hey Jim,

Huba huba.


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## JohnT (Feb 27, 2014)

I don't think Julie is going to like that post JS. 

I hope that I did not hurt your feelings. If I did, then I am sorry. This was just meant to be a funny continuation of the whole Welch's thing. 

We Cool????


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## wineforfun (Feb 27, 2014)

Jim,
I had to go back and read your post quite a few times. I couldn't understand why you were using the "American" reference. After about the fourth time, I finally saw the flag.


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## DoctorCAD (Feb 27, 2014)

Loved it!!!


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## JohnT (Feb 27, 2014)

wineforfun said:


> Jim,
> I had to go back and read your post quite a few times. I couldn't understand why you were using the "American" reference. After about the fourth time, I finally saw the flag.


 
Yea, got me puzzled too (I was born in Summit, NJ).


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## Elmer (Feb 27, 2014)

wineforfun said:


> Jim,
> I had to go back and read your post quite a few times. I couldn't understand why you were using the "American" reference. After about the fourth time, I finally saw the flag.



I still dont see this flag you speak of!


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## jamesngalveston (Feb 27, 2014)

what flag,,, all i saw was boots and boobs....good enough for me.....
great work johnt, exspecially with wordys pic......


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## jswordy (Feb 27, 2014)

JohnT said:


> I don't think Julie is going to like that post JS.
> 
> I hope that I did not hurt your feelings. If I did, then I am sorry. This was just meant to be a funny continuation of the whole Welch's thing.
> 
> We Cool????



Heck no, you did not hurt my feelings. I made the post in the same spirit you made yours. The photo does not show any nudity nor does it show anything you cannot see around a hotel pool or at the beach for a day, or on some wine labels that have been posted here. Jordan Carver is a beautiful young woman, and I posted that picture because I can think of no one who makes my patriotism rise as much as she does.


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## LoneStarLori (Feb 27, 2014)

@ JSwordy.... Wow! Just Wow.

JohnT, I thought is was very amusing. Although I almost lost my lunch on the cheese part.


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## jswordy (Feb 27, 2014)

And the only reason I used Jordan Carver's pic is because LoneStarLori was unavailable for a photo at the time! 

Oh Lord, this IS getting fun!!!!


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## wineforfun (Feb 27, 2014)

Thanks Jim, I had to change my signature above my pic.


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## LoneStarLori (Feb 27, 2014)

Ok, I admit I had not idea who she is. Asking $10 to access her website tells me everything I need to know. :<


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## jswordy (Feb 27, 2014)

LoneStarLori said:


> Ok, I admit I had not idea who she is. Asking $10 to access her website tells me everything I need to know. :<



Heck, Lori, just search Jordan Carver on You Tube.

For everyone else, she's a lingerie and swimsuit model. In other words, she's on her way to being a millionaire.

Is America a great country, or what????


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## jswordy (Feb 27, 2014)

Ahhhh, finally home. Aged one year and still getting better.


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## Runningwolf (Feb 27, 2014)

Wow it's been a long day now this long thread, just what I needed. You guys rock. John that was pretty creative and took you a while to put together. Glad to hear you gave up your "get out of corner" card. Looks like I'll be seeing you in the near future in the corner. You're on a roll and won't be able to avoid it.We'll bring the wine, Jim is already there with the video's and posters.


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## cimbaliw (Feb 27, 2014)

JohnT, thanks for the obscure SNL "Swill" reference, you made my day.

JSWordy, you are a great American.


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## the_rayway (Feb 27, 2014)

Hilarious johnT!

My only complaint is that the 'Corner' isn't closer to Canada...


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## Runningwolf (Feb 27, 2014)

the_rayway said:


> Hilarious johnT!
> 
> My only complaint is that the 'Corner' isn't closer to Canada...



Well duhhh, it's right around the corner!!


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## JohnT (Feb 28, 2014)

Runningwolf said:


> Wow it's been a long day now this long thread, just what I needed. You guys rock. John that was pretty creative and took you a while to put together. Glad to hear you gave up your "get out of corner" card. Looks like I'll be seeing you in the near future in the corner. You're on a roll and won't be able to avoid it.We'll bring the wine, Jim is already there with the video's and posters.


 
I think that this thread has earned me my own special reserved stool in the corner. One with my name on it.




cimbaliw said:


> JohnT, thanks for the obscure SNL "Swill" reference, you made my day.
> 
> JSWordy, you are a great American.


 
That was one of my favorite skits from the good old days. 

For the rest of you, it was a parody of an old Heinz ketchup commercial. "Swill, the bottled water straight from lake Erie". At the time, lake Erie was considered the most polluted body of water in the country.


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